Where I am...

An update on where I am would most likely be something you would like to know.. and just a fair warning on me being transparent.

Well though there have been many blessings and encouraging moments since the last time I posted… I can say there have also been some enduring, straining times as well. As a part of a Walkabout family, like any family, there are brothers and sisters who really push your buttons and test you. Though I love each of them, I have been deeply hurt by a few and have struggled through those times. Moments of not considering others or thinking before speaking have turned into nightly crying sessions and separation from those who have hurt me.

Through these times I have been reminded of the pain and hurt I have caused and endured with my own family. Though I love each of them, OF COURSE.. we have all hurt each other through these same actions. The experiences here have helped me to see how relationships in my own past have not been very loving and encouraging. Through those moments of weakness, I wanted nothing more than to talk with my sisters and just tell them how much I love them and hear them both tell me they love me back. Sappy… I know. But it is the truth.

I have also been experiencing some spiritual warfare as I try to dive deeper into the Word. Satan knows my weakest areas and he continues to use them to try to pull me away from Father. Moments of impatience, annoyance, and pride have led me to bitterness and stubbornness. These then feelings have led me to desiring to be in control, something I expressed last time that I am working on. All in all, I know that Satan is not in control and I will not let him win this battle.

I have since picked up my Beth Moore bible study through James… once I put down about two years ago when my world came crashing down. I just picked it up today, so I don’t have much to say about it, but I do know and am very excited about the things the Lord is going to show me as I pursue Him! Sweet friends I encourage you to be invested in the Word.. some way, somehow.

Beyond the brokenness, hurt, blessing and encouragement.. I can say I am SO happy to be here at Camp Eagle. If I ever imagined what a dream “home” could feel like.. this is it. A location in the wilderness that is away from everyone and all distractions of the world! An area that is so dark at night, no street lights, no city lights, an area that the beauty of creation is demonstrated to me every day and night! A time in my life to grow in my personal walk with Christ and His leading for me to follow His will! Honestly, I can’t express the overall happiness that surpasses all the negative or upsetting feelings I have ever had, all the trials I have ever faced, or anything else I could ever come up with!